feeling overwhelmed
The past few weeks have been very overwhelming for me. I went through the first ever breakup of my life, finished uni, started a new part time job, got serious about the gym again and in and amongst all that I’ve been majorly crashing out over what I actually want to do with my life.
Not many people talk about how hard it actually is to finish university and be faced with the incredibly daunting prospect of actually having to decide what you want to do for a living and how to even make that happen. Until you’re faced with it, the idea of ‘getting a job’ seems relatively easy, but the reality of it is so much more complicated. I think being the kind of person I am (a classic overachiever), I put a lot of pressure on myself to have everything figured out all the time, and now that isn’t the case I feel a tad lost to say the least. I know I’m not alone in this experience, there will be thousands of graduates across the country right now feeling the exact same thing.
Right now i’m taking it one day at a time, focusing on my mental and physical health the best that I can and trying not to be so bloody hard on myself. In this generation it’s difficult because there is so much pressure and flexibility at the same time, a paradox if you will. On the one hand, there’s so many more jobs and opportunities than there used to be. On the other, social media can make you feel like you’re behind while all these influencers are living their best lives on yachts in the Maldives and business gurus are flexing their six figure salaries trying to sell you some bullshit course. I’ve definitely had a lot more time on my hands since being home and it can be so easy to spend that time on TikTok and Instagram comparing myself and my life to other peoples, only to put my phone down feeling like a failure. So something that I’m really going to try and work on is creating rather than consuming. I know I said a few weeks ago that I’m going to start posting regularly again and I promise I will! I think just after not being consistent on Instagram in a long time I feel almost nervous to get back into it, and I also feel like I’m still figuring out what I want to post and the direction I want to head in with my account. I know people probably think it’s cringe posting when you don’t have a lot of followers but everyone starts somewhere am I right? I’m not trying to be the next big thing and gain millions of followers, I just think I’ve always been drawn to content creation and sharing my life in some capacity with the hope of helping and inspiring others.
What I’m trying to get across in this post is essentially that you don’t need to have everything figured out when you’re in your teens, your, early twenties, your late twenties even. You also don’t need to feel like a failure just because you’re not living the same lifestyle as the influencers all over your for you page sipping matcha lattes and going to pilates at 6am on a Monday morning. I think that’s all I have to say, my apologies if this is just one big ramble but if any of this resonates then feel free to send me a dm, i’m always open to talk if you need it.
lots of love,
Scarlett xx